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HAPPY VALENTINES DAY + lessons I'm learning in my single season

Happy Valentine's Day you guys!

I don't know what emotions this holiday stirs up in you, but I want each and every one of you to know that you are so loved (by me but especially God).

Lately God has been working in my heart and teaching me really, really big things. It's been a struggle to learn how to dig deep into the parts of my heart I've closed off for so long, but it's such a beautiful journey with the Lord. This Valentine's Day especially, Jesus has been doing some big heart work, and I want to share some of these lessons with you. No matter your relationship status, I pray that God would encourage you today and simply remind you of His crazy perfect and passionate love for you. :)

1. You have to let go of your past and your future.

Y'all, my entire life I've struggled letting go of my past hurts and future plans. It's hard to let go of the good memories and the bad ones. It's hard to let go of the people that you once loved with your entire heart. It's hard to let go of the harsh words and hurtful actions that have left you wounded and picking up the pieces. It's hard to let go of the dreams you have for the coming years and the people you plan to share them with. It's hard to let go of everything you envisioned your life being.

It's hard, but when you finally do it, you finally let go and give it to Jesus? It's the most freeing, most life-giving thing. You cannot grow, heal, or move on until you completely surrender your whole past and your whole future to the Lord. When you surrender in this way, and trust Jesus with it, He's going to teach you a whole new way to walk through life - one that involves keeping your hands and heart open to whatever He wants to do.

2. Sometimes the hardest part in your singleness is the growth that God has planned for you.

I heard about the single girl sadness, sobbing over your ex and envying the couples around you. I was prepared to feel physical pain when I saw happy couples, roses, and anything that reminded me of the relationship I did not have. But for me, that wasn't the hardest part. Sure, sometimes I get sad and a tiny bit jealous of the happy couples, but that was nothing compared to the deep heart work God has been using this season for.

No one told me that a lot of times, God uses your singleness to grab your attention and hold your heart and work on you. The things God has been teaching me, the hurts I've been processing, and the many, many things I've been releasing were not on my radar. And they are an amazing thing, let me tell you. I feel so blessed that the creator of the universe is taking the time to sort through my mess, but it's also been really hard. A hard, beautiful, bittersweet thing.

And this growth that's happening right now? It's preparing you and I for the seasons ahead of us. Believe it or not, God is doing these big, hard things in us so that we can go and be a light for Him. He's doing these things in us so that we can serve Him in whatever capacity He has planned for us, so that we can be a godly wife and mother and friend and teacher and whatever other role He has set apart especially for us. This growth is hard, but it is so important.

3. Holding onto anger, hurt, and jealousy gets you absolutely nowhere.

The world screams at us to take revenge and get what we deserve. The thing is, none of that is very good for your heart. None of that allows you to truly move on. I don't know how people have hurt you, what they've said to you, or how that one person just makes you feel so insecure. I know what that looks like in mine, but not yours.

For me, holding onto all of that only makes the struggle harder. It begins to consume me and fill my heart and mind with a bunch of nasty things that I don't want around here. It distracts me from the blessings I have right in front of me and completely limits the amount of growth I'm able to achieve. Because holding onto the anger, hurt, and jealousy? That's just something you refuse to surrender to Jesus. And when you refuse to surrender, try to carry that burden on your own? It's not sustainable, and one day, everything will snap. You have to let go of whatever hard feelings you're holding onto, so that Jesus is able to start working in the hurt and angry and jealous parts of your heart and bring you freedom.

4. The best part of singleness is being able to do it with Jesus.

I would say that I've always had a very close relationship with the Lord, but man, that has taken on a whole new meaning lately. In your singleness, you kind of have no one to rely on except for Jesus. You have your core support system, like your family and your friends, of course, but at the end of the day, it's you and Jesus. That sounds like a really lonely thing I'm sure, but it's actually the most beautiful thing. I've been learning to rely and cling to Jesus in a new way, completely and wholeheartedly, There's a new depth in your relationship with the Lord when you have to trust Him in the midst of pain, difficult healing, and long nights, and it's incredible the way you grow with Him in that place.

Even though singleness is hard in so many ways, it's also a gift. This is a season in my life where I can 100%, fully, wholeheartedly follow the Lord, and I am so thankful for that. My eyes are fixed on Him as we dance through this song we call life, and girl, this is the best partner you could ask for. Jesus is constant and faithful and better than our idea of the perfect guy. He is so good, and I am so content to simply be here, in this season, with Him.


I know that sometimes Valentine's can be hard for a lot of us - but just remember, Jesus loves you more than any guy ever could! I challenge you guys to really pause and reflect, especially this Valentine's season, on what God is teaching you and how you've grown during your single season.

I'd love to hear what you're learning and how you're growing, so let me know in the comments below! :)



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