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Purity from a Teen Girl's Perspective

When we talk about purity, usually people think about guys, sexual purity, and a whole lot of restrictions. Some people think that God's call for purity is God trying to ruin our lives and suppress our feelings, or that purity is mainly for the guys out there. But I don't believe that's the right view on purity at all.

Purity is more than just not having sex. Purity has more to do than just our bodies, because purity encompasses our entire lives.

Purity is more than a guy thing. Girls struggle with purity, too.

Purity is not about restricting ourselves. Purity is about being whole, set apart, and blameless. Living a pure life doesn't take away anything, but instead brings us to live in joyful, free communion with the Father.

"Flee from sexual immorality." - 1 Corinthians 6:18

Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. - Colossians 3:5

In this conversation about purity, I can't say that it has nothing to do with physical or sexual purity, because it does. God calls us to wait to have sex until marriage, and that's a really big part of it. Our world doesn't see sex as the precious gift God designed it to be, so as we navigate living a pure life, we absolutely have to stand alert in this world that tries to convince us to do everything the Bible says not to.

Scripture also emphasizes that sexual purity means guarding your heart and your eyes from things that may tempt you (Luke 11:34-35, Psalm 119:37).

In the Bible, physical purity is more than just not having sex, though. In the Old Testament, God gave commands about what animals were pure to eat, how to handle death and blood in a pure way, and even physical hygiene laws to keep His nation pure. Once Jesus came, most of those laws were fulfilled, but the importance of purity was still preached. Paul even discusses how some foods might be "okay", but not encourage purity and faith for everyone.

So what does this look like in everyday life? How do we apply this?

  • Have clear boundaries with your boyfriend or girlfriend (ie: explain that for now, you just want to hold hands and hug, or whatever you feel comfortable with)

  • Stay out of tempting environments (ie: don't be home alone with your boyfriend or girlfriend, actually do something together instead of Netflix and chill, stay away from people who encourage you to compromise)

  • Know your limits when it comes to food + what might lead to unhealthy habits

  • Take care of your body! (1 Corinthians 6:19-20)

  • Pray and ask God for wisdom on what staying physically and sexually pure looks like for you.

"Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God." - Matthew 5:8

"Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me." - Psalms 51:10

"Finally, brothers and sisters......whatever is pure......think about such things." - Philippians 4:8

Of course, purity also has to do with keeping a pure mind and a pure heart. Having a pure heart and mind is a little bit less straightforward than staying physically pure, but it is such an essential part of living in purity.

Being pure in heart means that your heart is set on the Father and the Father alone. A pure heart is committed to the Lord and loves Him with everything. A pure heart is cleansed by Jesus and is free of hypocrisy, shame, and sin. A pure heart is free from deceit and is truthful. A pure heart is aligned with what God desires.

Having a pure heart is more than cleaning up your act. A pure heart takes real, life change initiated by Jesus' death on the cross. It stems from an intimate relationship with the Lord and His work in you to live a holy, set apart life.

A pure mind is similar to a pure heart. A pure mind is filled with holy, clean thoughts - and that means filling our lives with holy, clean things to be focused on and protect our minds. A pure mind requires us to take captive every thought and submit it to Christ, and therefore glorify Him in all our thoughts.

How do we do this? How do we live this out - because it sounds great, but it also sounds really abstract and really inapplicable.

  • Keep your heart free from idols - Jesus should be on the throne of your heart (this is a process; it looks like continual surrender, continually learning to fall more in love with Jesus every day).

  • Invite Jesus to work on your heart, and seek Him every day to continue that transformation (ex: spend time in Scripture, prayer, worship, and fellowship, and allow Jesus to seep into your heart and transform it)

  • Guard your heart from anything impure + be aware of what influences the condition of your heart.

  • Fill your mind with pure, godly things (ex: worship music, memorize Scripture, uplifting Christian friends, Christian influences on social media, etc).


Living a complete life of purity is hard, especially in a world that encourages us to "follow our hearts" and do what we feel like. The problem with that is our hearts and feelings are ever changing, and we cannot find genuine truth or guidance in something that is any less than rock solid. As a teenage girl, I am surrounded constantly by impure, ungodly messages. But all of us are are called to surrender our hearts to the Lord and follow His example of what it looks like to live in a pure way. Jesus never changes, and He's called us to live a pure life. He's called us to pursue Him and allow Him to conduct life change within us.

What are your thoughts on God's definition of purity? Do you have any tips on what it looks like to live a life of purity? Please let me know in the comments down below, and if you have any prayer requests, drop those in the comments as well so that I can pray alongside you. :)



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