Songs of Songs Chapter 7: Speaking Words of Life and the Deepening of Intimacy in a Godly Marriage

We are in our second to last week studying Song of Songs, and I have learned so much as we've gone through this series! I've enjoyed it so much and found that the Lord is revealing new wisdom every week about what biblical relationships and sex looks like. Last week, we left off talking about practical ways that we can resolve conflict in a Christian relationship, and I was so encouraged by the example that Solomon set in chapter 6.

Similarly to last week, chapter 7 is a shorter chapter, and majority of it is Solomon complimenting and admiring his bride. I love how often he reassures her and lavishes her with sweet words. I can't help but think that how often Solomon compliments her is a reminder that our words are powerful and that we should be using them to build up our partner. In every single chapter, Solomon is praising both her character and her appearance - and sometimes, he's complimenting her for the entire chapter. I'm challenged to be more intentional with the words I speak over my partner and those I love, reminding them why I love them, and simply encouraging them. And for my single friends - when deciding who to date and invest your time in, be mindful of the words that others are speaking into you. Be careful to choose a partner who encourages and compliments you, just like Solomon did to his maiden, and be intentional about being that partner for them, too.

In this chapter, Solomon praised 10 things about his bride. On his wedding night, he specifically admired 7 of her qualities - meaning that as their marriage and relationship progressed, his love for her developed and deepened. Despite the trials that they walked through, Solomon found more reasons to love her, and I think that is so beautiful. They just reconnected after conflict, and it led to their love growing for each other. I think that's the end goal of resolving conflict: to find a greater intimacy and love for each other, and Solomon has exemplified that extraordinarily.

There's so much to unpack within this chapter that Solomon admired about his bride, but I want to highlight a few of the big things. In the very first verse, he complimented her as she danced, starting at her feet and moving up. Then, in verse two, he praised her waist and stomach. While it seems strange to us today, it's poetic. He creates the allusion that she is like a feast to him, satisfying and pleasurable. Solomon continues on by describing her breasts, comparing them to fawns of a gazelle. Again, this isn't normal to us, but he's implying that his bride is innocent, attractive, and matching in beauty. Sexuality is a key component in the way that Solomon is describing her, which shows me that it's an important part of the biblical marriage God designed for us.

In verse four, Solomon says that her neck is like an ivory tower, which communicates nobility and strength. It's really important to remember that while sex is an important part of their relationship, he loves her for so much more than that. Solomon recognizes that his bride is strong, capable, and selfless. She's virtuous and full of integrity, and he delights in her. In verses 5-6, he says that, "Your head crowns you like Mount Carmel. Your hair is like royal tapestry; the king is held captive by its tresses. How beautiful are you and how pleasing, my love, with your delights." Solomon sees his bride as royalty and he treasures her, mesmerized by her heart and her beauty. Talk about romantic! He assured her of how much he loved her and how attracted he was to her.

The next few verses were some of the more confusing ones to me, which say:

"Your stature is like that of the palm, and your breasts like clusters of fruit. I said, 'I will climb the palm tree; I will take hold of its fruit.' May your breasts be like clusters of grapes on the vine, the fragrance of your breath like apples, and your mouth like the best wine."

Solomon is expressing that he desires his bride. He loves her for more than her body, but he also wants to share that intimacy with her. I think that's another really special part about God's design for sex; it's more than a physical act, but a spiritual and emotional connection too. He loves her, and so he wants to give himself fully to her. That's what Solomon means when he's describing climbing the palm tree. In the second part of that section, he's communicating how satisfying their sex is to him. Being intimate with his bride is as sweet as fruit and intoxicating as wine. I love how clear Solomon has been throughout this entire book - the maiden never had to overthink or question how he feels about her.

For the first time in a bit, we hear the maiden respond to Solomon, recognizing the goodness of their sex. She says in verse 10, "I belong to my beloved, and his desire is for me," expressing just how secure they are in their love for each other and how committed they are. She's confident that her husband desires her, and they share a special unity in their marriage - just how God designed it. The maiden invites Solomon on a romantic trip where they can enjoy each other privately. By comparing their love to blossoms and blooming pomegranates, she's conveying that she wants to soak up the freshness and strength of their love and intimacy. Their relationship is growing, and they want to celebrate the ways that they've matured and deepened their connection.

And in the very final verse of the chapter, the maiden says this: "The mandrakes send out their fragrance, and at our door is every delicacy, both new and old, that I have stored up for you, my beloved." Mandrakes were believed to increase fertility, and she's inviting him to explore new things together in their intimacy. Throughout the course of this book, they've learned so much, but they're still committed to growing together. They're never done loving each other or giving each other 100% of all that they are, and that is so beautiful.

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Despite only being 13 verses long, there's so much for us to learn from this chapter! I'm challenged to speak words of life even more intentionally over Koa and the rest of my loved ones, which was something that Solomon did so beautifully. I'm also so encouraged by the reminder of how special and intimate sex is within the context of marriage and when done in the way that God designed it. God has given us a gift to unwrap when the time is right, and that makes the waiting so worth it.

I've learned so much throughout this series, and I can't believe we're almost finished with it! Make sure to come back next Tuesday for our eighth week and last post in our Song of Songs series!